Leaders, Whatever You Do, Don’t Say This...

As a coach, I’m always learning something new about leadership and how to help people grow. And that’s coming from someone who spent 16 years in corporate America!

Some of the things I hear from leaders make me smile. There are so many amazing people out there doing their best to make a difference.

But other things? Let’s just say they leave me shaking my head and wondering, “Why would anyone say that?”

Here’s a real example that I think hits home for a lot of people I coach.

If you’re a leader, please don’t say this:

"I know the company policy says new dads get 12 weeks of paternity leave, but tell me you’re not actually going to take all of that."

Here’s why: New parents—especially dads, as I’m learning—already feel a ton of pressure about taking time off. They’re juggling excitement, fear, and about a million other emotions. The last thing they need is you adding guilt to the mix.

If your company has a policy, it’s there for a reason. So don’t question it. Don’t make them feel bad about using it. Don’t add your own opinions or judgment.

Instead, be supportive. Wish them luck. Let them know you’re there if they need help transitioning back.

Pro tip for life in general: Let’s think before we speak, especially when it’s about something as important as family leave.

Let’s build workplaces where people feel supported, not judged.